Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Selective Osmosis

We are in a society where we are constantly watching our weight. I know I am forever "on a diet", it's just the norm. My brother is always going to the gym and coming home and saying he is watching what he eats and wants to only eat healthy and so the kids are picking up all this through osmosis. Kids have what I call "selective osmosis". It's similar to selective hearing. They just soak in the wrong info. So their uncle is playing sports and stays in shape to do so and so Tyler picks up on it as he is just starting his soccer season right now. This is a great thing. He is conscientious about what he puts in his mouth, he "tries" to avoid fatty foods, pizza and candy does not count. However he does understand that it is important that he stays active and gets his exercise. Ok. Great!

Well we were in line at the Stop & Shop last weekend and it was busy, there were quite a few ladies in front of us. We're standing and I had glanced at the magazine racks...of all the magazines, Tyler HAD to comment on the one I was pretty grossed out at myself. It was the National Enquirer and I don't even know who it was but it was not a flattering shot and it was from behind of some in a bikini. There was cellulite on cellulite on cellulite. Just not nice. Tyler points out and tells me pretty loudly "Mom! That lady needs to workout!" The problem with that was that every "lady" in front of us TURNED AROUND!!! Did I want to be buried right there in the floor of Stop & Shop? yes! This is something that he has picked up through "selective osmosis" from his uncle.

Everyday after school I ask the kids, "how was school today?" and they either answer fine or not good. Either way I probe. Can't be just fine, SOMETHING had to have happened! What did you do? blah blah blah. So Madison tells me that a reading teacher had come into her classroom. I said that was exciting! Getting extra help for the class to learn how to read was awesome...and Tyler chimes in "yeah, she came in our class too...the girl was kinda cute." I ask, "what girl?" I was a bit horrified. I knew the reading specialist was going in, but she was much older than me AND she was definitely NOT cute! He replied "the teacher!" and thats when I found out there was an assistant...my son only saw the assistant...didn't see the REAL teacher...

oy vay!

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

First Day of 1st Grade!

Here we are...it took 6 years and many days of whine and cheese, but full day school. Got the twins up and dressed and we could still hear the snoring in the background...their father had taken the day off for the 1st day of school festivities...glad he could help! Getting back into the swing of things is hard after a whole summer off.


So I got the kids breakfast, got snacks packed, supplies packed and we're ready to go...oh wait...Daddy is not ready. Really? Cheese n rice! Why are we always waiting for him??? So finally he's ready and we go and we walk to school. As we approach the school we begin to see old friends that we haven't seen all summer. Tyler is excited to see people and is waving hello and talking to some kids and takes off for his classroom. Madison had her normal anxiety and was hiding behind me and wouldn't say hi or even wave to anyone. As we walked down the hallway and Madison was shooting her darts of poison from her eyes, I was surprised people didn't start falling down to their knees.

She has this look on her face...this look of just disgust, she just doesn't hide her feelings, that's for sure! So we found her locker and put her stuff inside and took her folders and supplies into the classroom. Met Ms. L her teacher and then we were instructed to find our way around the classroom and put our supplies in the correct bins for the class to share and to put her name on her folders. So we did this and met old friends along the way and of course Madi was less than pleased to see them...or at least she appeared this way. As this was happening, I had instructed the boys, Tyler and his Dad to go to Tyler's class and get settled, emergency forms dropped off and yada yada yada...but as Madi and I were moving along I turned around to find the boys right behind us! Oy vay! Tyler was eager to go to his class but I think Dad had anxiety too! Did I have triplets??? good god! Cheese n rice! and then I hear the bell ring! by now I was no longer shvetzing, I was full blown sweating! I had said to one of the moms I am sweating! and she replied no here we shvetz! and I said oh no girl, I am way beyond shvetz, I am sweating!!! So I kissed Madi goodbye and sat her down with her dear friend Matthew to play dominoes. God bless Matthew, Madi's knight in shining armour!

I went into Tyler's room just in time to give him a quick kiss and a hug to wish him a great first day and pray that everything got to wear it needed to go...

After school...we came home Dad was in charge as I was working from home. The kids were home from 12-5 with him and I was in my home office before I came back up to realize "where is Tyler's lunchbox?" No one knew. Day 1 and missing lunchbox. Dad cleaned up 1 lunchbox and didn't ask where #2 was. Breathe. I went through the backpacks to see what came home, more forms...oh! and the emergency forms I had already filled out for Tyler and Dad was suppose to drop off when he was in charge of dropping of Tyler that morning...breathe...but running out of air. HE'S exhausted from the 1st day of school activities and doing dishes and taking care of the kids...which was watching a movie with them all afternoon...breathe...oh wait can't...no air!